A Unique Family

I was not raised in a normal family. The average American family has 2.5 children. I was the 5th of 12 children. The majority of US families are blended or single parent households. I was raised by two loving parents that both resided in my home. Currently most homes have both parents working outside the home. I was blessed to have a loving “stay at home mom” (but she was a working mother, remember 12 children). Those weren’t the only things that separated my family from the norm. My dad traveled in his work but was always an active parent, present at the birth of every child and home for all the major holidays I remember. We had a family band and performed locally and regionally at weddings, nursing homes, school dances and bars. Mama was an undiscovered artist writing Christmas pageants, painting murals on the walls and allowing her children equal creativity even to the point of my brother’s painting their bedroom walls black and covering their ceiling with swirling red and white stripes dotted with stenciled blue stars. She didn’t flinch when they replaced their light fixture with a black light and covered the black walls with psychedelic posters; after all it was the 70s.
But don’t get the idea that we were free spirited "hippy" children. We were a grounded Catholic family that said the family rosary, went to mass on Sunday and weekdays and sang in church more than anywhere else, often making up the whole choir. Mama read us bedtime stories from the Lives of the Saints; I believe she was hoping we would follow in their footsteps.
I remember once when we were performing Christmas music at the State Children’s Home in Wyoming and a little boy came up to my brother and said, “Your family is weird.” My brother never missed a beat as he smiled and replied, “I think the word you are looking for in unique.” From that day on I have always believed I was the product of a unique family and I always smiled at that thought.
When I married Steve, who most people describe as a playful, guy that forgot to grow up, and we began our family how could we expect them to grow up to be anything but unique.
Our girls started their lives in Wyoming surrounded by enough cousins, aunts and uncles to fill our home to over-flowing. So when we moved to Indiana where we had no family my youngest asked with all sincerity, “But who will come to our birthday.” We soon learned that you don’t really have to share blood to be family and there were wonderful friends that opened their hearts, homes and families to us so we could share the holidays. With this change we realized that some of the family traditions that worked in Casper with a very large family didn’t work well with our smaller crew so the girls began to create new traditions. Thus began the commemorating of Dios de los Muertos at the Art Museum for Halloween (whenever possible), dressing up as Indians and Pilgrims on Thanksgiving, and the afternoon Thanksgiving “craft with a twist competition” after the meal instead of football (remember all my children are girls) of course Steve and the husbands still have the option of football if they feel the need, the annual cutting of the Christmas tree as a family and the Christmas family crossword puzzle (where every question is about someone or some event in the family’s history).
We are a close family but each has their separate interests and calling. Tana is my oldest and she and Nic have a son Cohen. Nic is a photographer and Tana a lawyer. Angie and Nick (yes, they are both named Nick, just to make it confusing for me when I’m old) own and run and bagel/sandwich shop and grille. They have three children, Calvin, Henry and Marley and live just outside our town on a three acre mini-farm. Stephanie our youngest is single and works as a therapist for a community mental health center. She likes to claim the title of “Favorite Aunt and Spoiler of the Grandchildren.”
Steve and I have good-a-nuf health. Good enough health to allow us to continue working, Steve with computers and me in mental health. We are members of the community music club and I still sing at the church but we spend most of our free time enjoying our children and our grandchildren. I teach them things they need to know and Steve teaches them how to get in trouble.
So I am the product of a unique family and I raised my children in a unique family and now I sit back and watch with pride as they raise their children in their own unique families. Life is good!